Living with the knowledge that what is will soon cease to be is very draining—like running a resource-intensive computer program in the background.
I think people who are losing a loved one slowly call this “anticipatory grief?” Poor dears. Must be immensely unbearable for them.
Here, everything lately is “the very last time” — our last Tuesday together, our last goodnight chat. One last hug this morning (a long one), before leaving the hotel to drive to school to move in.
At least I’ll still be able to text my child throughout the day, and talk to her when she’s free and willing.
She isn’t going to be gone-gone.
Just: gone.
